1. We will never, ever sell, rent, trade or give your information away to anyone for any reason.
    
2. We use top-of-the-line technology to keep your information safe.
    
3. We will never spam you or send you ads for Viagra, Imitation Rolex Watches or anything like that
    
4. We will send you emails to make sure you received products you buy from us and from time to time we'll let you know when other products we create become available.
    

Now, here's the same thing I just said but with all the legal mumbo jumbo that the lawyers forced me to put on the site: